Monday, December 13, 2010

My "Adult Bully"

Posted by Double Y at 2:53 PM
 "The only thing I'm guilty of is humiliating a bully" so says Dr. House in an old  House episode I watched the other day. Come to think of it, I am guilty of that as well, not as a bully but as someone who spoke her mind off and went against the supposed "leader of the group".

 Bullying happens in all ages, not just in kids at school or at play. In fact that's where they start. They start at an early age, they bully kids for their lunch money, for a cool toy or anything that you own that caught their attention. They become popular and feared off by the rest of the kids. They are regarded as someone who is cool as you'd want to join him if you can't beat him. (Self preservation is a must.) They glorify him as if he owns the world or that it only revolves around him. He is only sensitive to his feelings and doesn't care about yours..

  Bullies come in different shapes and sizes, short and tall, fat and thin. My bully was short and fat. Come to think of it, I've never met a bully who's tall and thin. They're mostly fat, stocky, and definitely not thin for they need the weight and the size to prove their point. Plus thin and tall sometimes equates to being a wimp and you can't be a bully if you are a wimp in the first place. I'd say, The short and fat ones are the rudest of them all for they surround themselves with several minions as to cope up with their lack of height. They terrorize more than your average bully as they are one too many.

  Bullying comes in various types and forms and for me I've classified them as the ordinary kid bullying, there's the adult bullying and then in the golden age of internet and particularly Social Networks, there's cyber bullying. My bully was an adult one and a cyber as well or perhaps he's all three. He's gotta start somewhere anyway,lucky me I've met him only when I was in my late 20s. He masqueraded himself as a friend when I first met him so as to see if I can be a part of his group or one of those who he would terrorize. Initially, I got in, I was cool for him then things changed. I was now a looser, a wimp and someone who he can push over. Life was easy when I was still "in" his circle for all I had to do was say yes to all he says, say no when he says no,laugh at his corny jokes, take all his hurtful remarks as constructive criticisms, all in all just bow down to what he says and do and everything was bright and shiny!But if and when you dare question what he says, you know you are into a big fight with him and the rest of the group who are still jaded. He dictated what was cool and what was not, he planned for everything,leaving no room for your suggestions. He even bullied his way up, hang us dry when he saw that we were useless and that we might be going up as well.

 So when the time came that I had to speak up,let my feelings be known to him and to the rest of the pack, I got booted out of the "cool group", instead I became a competitor,he made me look like as if I am the villain and he is the hero. He turned my (so called) friends against me, and had fun at my expense. When I was down and low he kicked me, and made fun of me, and that was the end of it and the start of me living. Living my own life, without having to abide by his rules, without thinking of what I am doing is cool for him or not, I dress up and say what I say as I want to and not in accordance to him. I buy stuff as I please and not to please him. Now I find life as lovely as ever, no rules, no constrictions, no bully... When I am amongst friends, I am who I really am, no mask to wear, no walking on thin glass, I am who I am..

 Well of course, the story doesn't end there, he still bullies me cyberly (if there is such a word),fb comments here and there,says things behind my back and laughs at my expense still. But that's who he is, that how he really is. He shows strength but deep inside him you know he is weak. He craves attention for no one really listens to him, for those who listens to him are those who are scared of him.

He is a bully and forever he will be, only if and when you let him be...

*Cyberbullying is rising at an alarming rate, for more information on how to avoid them and what to do click here..*

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